How Is It That?-?-?

I t was so simple a surgery… Forty minutes tops….

But I was Gilligan and it was the minnow…

Short term anesthesia is not meant for a four hour tour and I have not yet been able to clear my head… They just kept pumping it in…

OF course on New Years eve things went bad and I quit urinating.. and I really feared death and kidney failure..

But who to call… Or why call??

The loneliest moment of my life was when the surgery began and the anesthesia was injected and I knew that the one person I cared for with all my heart did not care if I lived or died..  And also there was no one awaiting my awakening.. Just two dogs home alone..

How has my life come to this? Where are my friends? Wait I do not have any in Shreveport.. That is the problem.. I do not get along well with red necks and people who do nothing but drink and hunt and fish..

I know the verges of loneliness and insanity.. I have teetered…

Oh if only I could remember the feeling of being in her arms.. If I could feel that.. If I Could retain that warmth.. I would forever be ok…

The emotional temperpedic has retaken its shape and I know I lay in her arms.. I see the picture of her looking down at me and I think it love.. But… Was it?

I miss being cared about…